Getting From Here to There: A Vision for the Future Part 1

Getting From Here to There: Intro

As you look into the face of your precious 2 year old, it is hard to image 16 years could go by and someday you will be looking up into the precious (or perhaps pernicious) eyes of your 18 year old. What will shape the content of your parenting for the next 12 or so years? By age 14, wise parents are moving from the directive stage of parenting into a coaching stage.

From birth to about 12 years of age, parents has the most influence in developing character in their child. There is a transition time from around 12 to 14. By age 14, kids are going to do what they want. Their decisions are influenced by friends, media, school, church and their family and other influences you can’t image now. Who knows how the media/entertainment/educational industries will develop over the next two decades and how that will affect your child’s thinking.

Now is the time to think carefully about what is important to you as a person and how to transmit that information to your child. What matters to you? What do you value in terms of character? Than what is the process you will use over the next 12 or so years to teach your child is what is important. In effect, what is your vision for your child as an adult?

Start with what is important…do you value integrity? Gentleness? Faithfulness? Self-control? Being responsible? The willingness to work hard? Some traits to think about in deciding what you value:

• Accountability  Friendliness  Loyalty
• Caring             Frugal           Obedience
• Character        Fun              Openness / privacy
• Charity            Generosity    Patience
• Compassion    Gentleness    Peace
• Credibility        Helpfulness   Perseverance
• Desire             Honesty        Politeness
• Duty                                   Responsibility
  
•  Hope                                 Respect
• Empathy         Humility        Self-control
• Excellence      Imagination
  
• Fairness         Integrity         Sportsmanship
• Faith              Judgment       Strength (internal)
• Flexibility        Knowledge    Team player
•   Logic            Tenderness
• Trust              Trust-worthiness

When you think about your child’s character as an adult what do you most desire for them to be?

Comments

[Nichole]

What a scary post this is! :)

I want to embed the Fruits of the Spirit in my children: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control.

[Carol Taber]

I was going for challenging and though provoking! I'll try to dial it back a little!

[*nemo*]

Hi there!
Thanks for the comment about my vegetable garden, yeah, those zucchinis are weird!

This is a great post! So much important things to think about when raising children. I don't have any kids of my own but am already worried about life out there... I've seen the schools and work environments, and frankly it frightens me.

All we can do is be the best example, guide them while they are young and hope that one day when they have to make choices on their own that they will remember their foundation and stick to their beliefs. As parents all you can do is your best. The rest we must leave in God's able hands.