Raising kids is challenging. Raising future adults is more challenging. The difference between raising kids and raising future adults is the deliberateness on the part of the parents in developing character into their children. We have a tough parenting situation right now. Some other family members were complaining about how we (meaning I) are dealing with the situation. I responded this was not an issue of training as if more information would alter the child’s behavior. This is a heart issue. Am I surprised we are facing this issue? I was overwhelmed at the intensity of the emotion involved. I am not surprised at the heart attitude revealed. Character training reveals heart attitudes both honoring and dishonoring.
American parents oft times mix up achievement training and character training. We teach our 2 year olds the alphabet and our 3 year olds to read. We find the best preschools, schools, camps and experiences to give our kids an edge in life. If the kids perform well, we are tempted to think they are people of character. High achievement and character, while they interact in a life worth living, is not the same thing. We have seen the difference blazoned in the media recently. Under stress, the cracks in John Edwards’s character were revealed. Some of what he has achieved is now lost because of his lack of character.
Are Edward’s parents responsible for his lack of moral diligence? No, adults are responsible for their own behavior. Not knowing his parents I am still willing to bet had John lived out what he had learned at home, he would have given a keynote address at the DNC. Character matters.
Character training in children gives parents the opportunity to transfer values in their family. It offers protection for their children as adults in similar way achievement training can give an edge to children to get a head as adults.
For Christian parents character training is an opportunity we can use to reveal the character of our amazing God to our children.
Next week: Where to start? A vision for the future.