Parenting Semi-Adults: The Truth about Princess
Sunday, September 7, 2008 at 08:33PM My eldest daughter Princess was reading through my blog. She noted that I only mention her when I am aggravated about something. That is true. It is far easier to write about laundry room problems and over drawn debit cards or college decisions than the good things. I admit I take the good for granted.
There is a lot of unexplored territory in parenting a semi-adult. Writing for the blog helps me clarify my thoughts and think in terms of principle instead of I want to ground her. I like grounding, so much simpler than thinking through what I want to see in her as we finish her upraising. I my defense I try to be balanced. I post about my faults also. That does not seem to come across to the kids. They still see me through MOM glasses. MOM glasses filter any information that might make mom seem human. I wore them with my mom also.
The truth about Princess is she is a wonderful young woman. She works hard at her job and her schoolwork. She is a good friend. She is wise. I have listened to her as she talks with her friends about “life issues” and have been amazed at the wisdom that flows from her lips. Where did she learn that at such a young age?
She is brave and confident. I was so painfully shy at her age I watch in awe as she sails into new situation, easy or hard facing the challenge instead of running from it. She faces life at 18 with the confidence I did develop until well into my 30’s. Princess is usually empathic, often kind and she has a biting wit. She can gently lob an insult and you don’t realize you have been struck until you think about it later. (Not necessarily a good thing but it does make her interesting.)
She has never given us any real trouble: no drugs, drinking or criminal behavior. I like most all her friends, even the odd ones. She has dated the same handsome, faith-filled, football playing, creative, responsible, younger, young man for the last 2 years. To give you an idea: Some time in a conversation, Princess mentioned she liked kola bears. For Christmas, the above-mentioned young man made her a stuffed kola bear by hand from a pattern he designed (because he couldn’t find a kola pattern.)
At 18, she has a relationship with Jesus that is independent of her father and me. She is active member in another church even though she still lives at home. I would like to take credit for who Princess is at this stage of her life but I know it is her relationship with Jesus that shapes her heart and mind and impacts her world.
The truth about Princess is she is at heart the King’s daughter.
Is it easier for you to talk about the struggles concerning your kids or the good stuff?
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Reader Comments (4)
There are so many good things to share about my daughters, but I usually only do it with my husband and close family members. I do tend to share my struggles more with my friends, partly because I'm venting or looking for solutions, and partly because I don't want to seem as if I'm bragging. To my children, I do tell them often that they are beautiful, smart, kind, lovely, and talented. I hope some of it sticks with them when it counts.
My children are still very young. I think that makes it easier for me to take a deep breathe and move on to focus on the sweet things they do. That being said, I do vent about them every now and again.
Your daughter sounds like a great kid.
I think both of you are lucky ! You did not specifically about thrust however it is very important when raising teenager and young adults. This is why I think you are lucky, So many parent would like to be proud of their children. Maybe faith help to stay out of trouble to at least to have sincere friendship.
I am very fortunate and my daughter is a great kid. I tend to major on the minors because she is so nice. Thank you for the thoughtful, thought provoking comments.